r/politics – The Republican National Convention will exclude the press and renominate Trump in private for the first time in modern history

r/politics – The Republican National Convention will exclude the press and renominate Trump in private for the first time in modern history

We’re Republicans, and…

A man’s home is his castle! (Unless the police knock)

We hate redistribution of wealth! (Unless it’s for the 1%)

We believe in state’s rights! (Unless it has sanctuary cities)

We’re the party of Lincoln! (With recent endorsements by the KKK)

We believe in free trade! (And the occasional old fashioned trade war)

We’re the party of fiscal responsibility! (When Democrats are in office)

We’re pro-life! (Except when it comes to pandemics, war, and executions)

We believe in personal responsibility! (With the exception of family planning)

We’re pro-family values! (Unless it’s to separate families and put kids in cages)

We’re pro-personal liberty! (Gay marriage, abortion, and cannabis not included)

We believe in small government! (Unless we have to roll the army into your town)

We love the United States of America! (But go ahead and wave those Confederate flags)

We defend personal private property! (Unless we have to seize your land to build our wall)

We want a return to public decency! (Like those very fine people who marched in Charlottesville)

We believe in freedom of speech! (Though we may tear-gas peaceful protesters from time to time)

We believe in equal opportunity for all! (It’s just a coincidence that our policies hurt people of color)

We’re the party of law and order! (Unless it’s Trump, he can break all the laws)

We believe in traditional Christian morality! (Except for electing a thrice married adulterer who ran on the promise of committing war crimes)

America first! (Assuming Russia approves)

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